Scared by the Make Up Monster

Last night I experienced probably the most culture shock I’ve had since I’ve been in Ireland. This occurred when I went over to a friend’s house, where she and her friends were meeting up before going out. Her friends rolled in with cases of makeup larger than my stage makeup box. They stripped down to their underwear to apply fake tan to their entire bodies, while singing along to the new Jennifer Lopez songs they had turned on Youtube. A minimum of four hair straighteners were in use at a time. Little did I know that you straighten your hair before you tease it, curl it, insert hair extensions, and spray the crap out of it with one or more products. They broke out sets of makeup brushes and every possible color and shade of powders, creams, and sticks, applying layer upon layer until I barely recognized them. All of this occurred in a whirl of talk about diets, workouts, master cleanses, and celebrity bodies.

I sat watching in amazement. I felt like I was backstage at a beauty pageant. “So THIS is what sororities must be like”, I thought to myself. I was terrified, but fascinated. I was quite literally observing something completely foreign to me. My friend came over and asked me if I was alright. I looked at her, with my air dried hair, lacking any sort of product (save some lotion to calm the frizzies), and 5 minute makeup job, and whispered, “I’ve never seen anything like this before.” One of the girls turned around and half joking asked me if I thought they were vain. It took everything to hold back the resounding YES!

 And then there was me....

Finally, (AFTER 2 HOURS) I went out with them to the club. Eventually, I met up with another American there, who had gotten ready in a similar manner as I. I told her about the freak show that had preceded the taxi ride and how uncomfortable I felt being in the club surrounded by such made up girls. She paused for a second and said, “Jenna, how many guys have asked you to dance tonight?”

“6….”

“Right. And how long have those girls been standing in a circle together dancing and trying to attract guys?”

“The whole night…”

“Guess they wasted those two hours getting ready, huh?”

It was perfect.